Happy. Sad.
Most youngsters can recognize these feelings from a very early age.
However, what about the myriad of other feelings that pop up within our hearts?
Anger. Loneliness. Excitement. Jealousy. Worry. Disappointment. Anticipation
The ability to express and recognize our emotions has a tremendous impact on our lives.
Our ability to communicate with others is vastly improved; which, in turn, will boost our social and professional life.
Recognition of our feelings helps us cope with the inevitable bumps in the road we call ‘life’.
One of the greatest gifts you, as a parent, can give your child- is to teach your child the language of emotions. Your youngster will grow up to be a far better spouse, parent, and employee if he can understand and verbalize emotions.
Emotional vocabulary is the first step:
- Matching facial expressions with emotions beyond the standard ’sad’ and ‘happy’. Example: Now Mom looks angry; Dad looks surprised. The ability to identify and name the emotion gives the chld ownership of the feeling, which will help her cope with it when the time comes.
Identifying emotional expressions is the second step:
- In addition to facial expressions, body language can communicate a feeling. Actions and words also convey emotions. When a child can connect a specific emotion to specific gestures or actions, he can better understand what other people are feeling. Example: When Mom is pacing with the phone, she is busy; if Dad is raising his voice, he is feeling angry.
Understanding the causes and effects of emotions is the third step:
- As parents, we often strive to teach our children natural causes. If you forget your homework at home, the teacher will be disappointed. If you place your glass at the edge of the table, it is likely to spill. Similarly, there are emotional rules: Jealousy always has a source; disappointment can be traced to a specific cause. Example: Because I wasn’t careful with the appliance, it broke and I am upset. Or, as a result of my persistence in a certain endeavor, I have accomplished a lot and feel proud of myself.
Helpful hints:
Make it a habit to identify emotions by name:
“Oh, my, you must be livid that Mom went shopping without you!”
“You seem to be feeling satisfied.”
“You can’t decide which one to choose? Sometimes I also feel undecided.”
“I was so worried when the carpool did not bring you home. Were you worried while you were waiting for such a long time?”
Keep in mind:
Our job as parents is not to ensure our children’s happiness.
Rather, our role is to provide our children with the tools that they need to deal life’s ups and downs.
By teaching our children the language of emotions, and sharpening their awareness of feelings, we will help them cope with whatever curve balls life may throw, and better relate to those around them.
