Comments on: Chores for Kids

By: Chadder

Chadder — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 05:14:10 +0000

My kids are 7 and 3. When it came to chores, I just browsed the net and found some chore charts (my kids liked the designs in the website kidrewardzone). We filled up the chores and columns to mark a star in each chore. There is a minus for each negative behavior, like tantrums, not using dustbins for trash, and so on. They would get bucks for each star minus each negative mark. A trip to the park on Saturday, if BOTH get all the stars (here I don’t count the negatives)for the week. Now, there are no arguments, yelling, and shouting. Its only “YAAAAYYY…”

By: Lyn

Lyn — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 12:27:02 +0000

Read the book “Money Doesn’t Grow on Trees” It is excellent, and easy to read. I believe it is just what you need to solve your problem. Blessings. Lyn

By: Mary

Mary — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 07:38:15 +0000

If you liked the Super Nanny, you may want to get all those great ideas in a book form. Easy reading and so appropriate for parenting children of all ages. The original book is out of print. It’s called “Systematic Training for Effective Parenting.” I don’t remember the author, but can be found through Amazon by the title (and very cheaply). I used it with my own child and now using it for over 30 years (working as an occupational therapist with children who have disabilities). Parents can’t believe how their dreams for their family have become a reality. They are finally having a loving, peaceful, happy family with respectful, caring and responsible children. Both parents must be aligned, however, for this simple program to work.

By: Alyssa

Alyssa — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 17:52:23 +0000

Love this advice about chores. I too have an 8 year-old and struggle with how to help her learn responsibility through doing chores. The “when/then” is great advice.
Regarding the question about paying allowance and example of encouraging kids to save their allowance, I got my daughter a fabulous “bank” for Christmas that has been amazing at encouraging her to save her money. It’s “The Savings Machine” from INGdirect for only $19.95. It’s an interactive toy/bank that teaches kids how to save instead of spend money. To learn more, go to http://www.shop.ingdirect.com. While I also have a savings account for her at ING, it’s not the same experience as her feeling and seeing the real money grow. INGdirect is also a great place to set up savings accounts particularly for kids and they have Planet Orange-an interactive website that teaches kids about financial responsibility. Check it out at http://www.orangekids.com. I promise I have no interest or affiliation in INGdirect, I’m just a super happy customer and am a huge fan of anything that helps kids learn to save money.

By: nate

nate — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 16:32:57 +0000

Just a thought as I am a single dad with a 5 yr old girl and 7 year old boy. We dn not do allowance, but they do get “wages” (I forget what the Dave Ramsey course calls it). I’ve recently decided that as their money grows, they will get gift cards for a store. The card is always theirs to spend as they want, but they know they can’t spend more than card is worth. So far i have one child who wants to save cards for a large purchace and one who likes to spend whenever the chance comes. they both love the idea of it being their money and their learning valuable lessons.

By: Annita Woz

Annita Woz — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 15:48:43 +0000

love the when/then idea.
love the everyone doing their own to help the family, rewarding independence, we call it : everybody doing their part to run a house cuz mom cannot do it alone.
we pay allowance for compliance to requests, we do not pay for chores.
that means I need a happy face when they are asked to do something to help run the house and i have to give a happy face when they complete it (even if it isn’t done perfectly)
we also encourage putting away stuff after we are done using it. I admit, I’m always learning on this one. I love to drape yesterdays clothes over the back of the chair in my room, I love to read the paper and leave it out thinking i’ll come back to it, etc. My mom once joked that she should build a house that doesn’t have any flat surfaces cuz she just stacks stuff everywhere! We are getting better about the clean up/put away since I made a place for everything- or at least designate a laundry basket to each kid for quick clean up trips. When we all clean up behind ourselves, it is also easier for me to do the dirty work of scrubbing the floors, laundry, etc cuz I can see the dirt instead of all the stuff.
and don’t forget to include Dad- kids love to see dad helping run a house, and my hubby will gladly do the clean up behind himself if it means that he doesn’t have to the dirty work of scrubbing the floors/ the toilet/the cooking! PS I love to cook- it’s my favorite chore! shhh, don’t tell my kids.

By: Nancy

Nancy — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 03:01:46 +0000

Such a relevant topic! My 1st 2 children are 12 months apart and #2 and #3 are 20 months apart…in the toddler years I struggled to keep up with them much less my own chores!
As the children got older and more independent, I started instituting the family team work ethic…when the kids were 2, 3 and 4 and my husband was deployed, I realized I needed the help!
As I made dinner, I would call the children to wash hands, clear the table of their things and take turns setting out plastic water cups, a fork at each place, and a napkin as well. I wouldn’t serve food until their
job was completely done…because we were “all helping each other and working together.” Later, I had them clean their rooms and put their toys back in the toy bins when I started cooking, and then clear and set the table.
They actually like the idea of being my waiters. They also scraped their own plates and cleared their settings. Now, they are 5, 6, and 7 and I wash and fold all their laundry and each of them puts away their own pile of clothes…every type of clothing has a specific drawer. All of these “shared” chores help me maintain sanity and order in my home!
I have had stressed out times when I would get frustrated and yell, or get angry and impatient, but usually that just dealt with external behavior and not my kids’ hearts and will.
I have found that if I just implement this kind of routine with gentle consistency and reinforce the “no eating until each of our jobs get done” my job being the cooking, then the kids follow suit. I even applied the “you may be excused from dinner until you can eat without complaining” rule. Very effective after just a few attempts! I make it about their own choices, they can help out and appreciate mom’s efforts, or they can forgo the benefit of eating a meal with the family and go contemplate life in their rooms.
I’ve used repetition and gentle redirection for night-time routines of shower, getting PJs on, bringing dirty clothes to the laundry room and brushing teeth, and all three are very good at taking care of their personal routine, morning and night with just a little help and guidance from me.
Sure, in the beginning it was hard and they resisted… but the consistency pays off. Now I am expecting my 4th, 5 years after the 3rd child, and we have such a great routine down that I don’t feel frazzled at all. My first three children are looking forward to helping me with the baby and I know that they truly will!

By: Cindy

Cindy — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 02:41:13 +0000

I like all these ideas! I’ve learned with mine – 9 and 7 – that it really works when I honestly let them know that I need there help. I often call it needing some “kid power” – works great for unloading groceries from the car! Make it fun – once I had taught them how to dust, clean mirrors, water plants, feed the cats – we all pick 3 chores, turn up our favorite music and have fun getting it done all together. It has definately become easier over time. I also firmly believe from all my reading and parenting classes that allowance should not be tied to household help. The purpose of allowance is to teach them how to handle money. The chores are part of being a family team. So we give just $12 to each child per month and they have 3 envelopes to divide it between – spending, saving and giving. They love getting to choose the charity or cause to give their donations too. And they take their own money to the bank to deposit. It helps their math skills to count their money, divide it out, see how it all works and make decisions about how to use it! Good luck to everyone!!

By: Samantha

Samantha — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 00:43:06 +0000

This is a fantastic article. I am one of those mom’s that used to re-do anything and everything my daughter tried to do. I still find myself re-doing it days later after she’s forgotten, but I’ve noticed she now pays more attention and wants to do it like mommy. She is 7 yrs old, and has certain small things she is expected to do. But I really like Vanessa’s idea of having the allowance transfered over immediately. Great ideas here, and I look forward to more great info I can use in the future.

By: Vanessa

Vanessa — Wed, 18 Feb 2009 23:35:02 +0000

We like a scaled down flylady schedule for our kids at home. When the kids do their tasks with minimal parent, um, encouragement – we give up to $1.00 per day (.50 am & .50 pm). What works for us is that we are not paying for the chores, which should be one to help our family/community, but rewarding independence. Also – our bank allows us to transfer the $$ directly into their accounts w/out fees, so they get the immediate gratification of seeing their accounts grow & no lost coins!

By: Bernadette

Bernadette — Wed, 18 Feb 2009 22:26:40 +0000

We always struggle with ‘what is allowance worthy’ and what is just plain part of being a family and having responsibilities. Any suggestions for making those distinctions? Sometimes it’s more obvious—like walking the dog goes along with the responsibility of having one— cleaning their rooms (which makes Mom happy and, as they’ve pointed out–isn’t something important to them)– is added to the chore chart. Also, when it comes to allowance–we started with a basket of goodies–which included a dollar or two, along with other things–more often than not, the dollar was the last thing left in the basket. What amounts of money do you think are appropriate allowances for various ages? Mine are 8 and 10 years old.

By: Phyllis

Phyllis — Wed, 18 Feb 2009 22:15:47 +0000

Oh, am I guilty here! I like things cleaned in a very specific way, so I have not let my children help out beyond putting their laundry in the hamper!!! Boy, did I need this article… thank you… gotta run and wash the floor, lol:)